Love is the killer app
When I rebranded by blog many months ago, I did not realize that I was infact trending towards Tim Sander’s POV. The New Global We I now believe, is an expression of what connects us, all the way from India, China, to Uruguay, France and the United States.
I believed for so long that only the cut-throat survive, and that not being one of them blows. What compounded that thought was the fact that I am not one of them and never will be. Hailing from a country like India where brawn still many-a-times overrules the brain, I figured that my game was over.
Then I read Love is the killer app. Ah, the power of books, and especially the ones recommended by people you admire and love. The concept is not new, but the description is refreshing. You always knew the subject, but you did not know how to implement it and Tim tells you what to do.
There are days where I absolutely *hate* someone, and there are the months where I carry over such hatred. While it is certainly satisfying, to be seething under the surface about this-or-that wrong, it is pointless. If this was 1000 A.D, it would be worthwhile because I’d walk over and mete out justice the old fashioned way. Obviously that is not going to turn out well for me. I’m not a powerful overlord that can kill a cut-throat’s career with one bad recommendation (really, who can do that these days?) or voodoo their good luck away.
What I can do, is love them. The New Global We is as much collective love as collective consciousness. It is also pointless if we’re connected through global networks with people, if we don’t like or love them. What collective love can do for misfits like me, is carve a path through the world of business and life. The worst that can happen to me is you rejecting my love and friendship, which is OK by me.
In business, the word love is cliched and “inappropriate”. You’re not supposed to love your colleagues, vendors, clients or boss(es)! This myth is spread by the cut-throats that are threatened by a loving person’s meteoric rise in stature and importance. Cut-throats also know they can’t influence bizlovers through their usual strategies. They believe lovers are weak and they are probably right under certain circumstances. Lovers also tend to give others more chances, more opportunities to try again. Lovers will listen to your sob stories for much longer, even if it includes some grapevine material inserted on purpose. At that very point in time, the cut-throats will be laughing their way to the bank when the lover is listening to you and not making money for himself/herself.
Love as a killer app works for me because cut-throats and lovers are all terminal and cannot take anything with them when checking out. Being terminal is the Great Leveler of humanity. When you think like that, the hate you feel after every argument or against someone that has wronged you, just evaporates. Really, what else can you do? I choose to be a lover and I am glad I am not a cut-throat. The only response I have to cut-throats these days in any case, is love.
Hate doesn’t give you solutions. There is one simple take away from Tim’s book. If you forgot everything else you read in it, then this is it – replace the word “hate” with “love”. For example: “I hate it when my computer slows down” or “I hate it when clients ask for one thing and then change their mind”. Rephrase it like so: “I’d love it if my computer worked faster” or “I’d love it if they figured out what they want and then asked for it”.
The word “hate” ends conversation and “love” (re)starts it.